Since I gave up the single life and settled down to become a hip suburban mama, I have found more then a few annoying questions for which I have no answer.
Is there no answer…or am I just that blond?!
Where DOES the other sock go?
Why DO men think it’s OK to fart in the marital bed?
At what point do us young, vital women, start making that odd grunting groaning noise as we drag our behinds off the floor?
How is it that in a house with four people, two of which are adults, the wife seems to be the only one who has mastered the art of changing the roll on the toilet paper roll?
Why is it that men get better looking with age, and women just get old?
When did Kraft dinner with a side of wiener and an apple become a well balanced meal?
What did I do before kids?
When did the definition of an amazing evening change? I’d gladly pass up a night out at a bar in exchange for a quiet evening at home with Hubby, a bowl of popcorn and a rented flick.
At what point did I stop just grabbing clothes off the shelf in the store that were “my size” and taking them to the cashier? Now everything must be tried on.
When did finding a bikini that actually fits, or a pair of jeans that look fab become a true victory?
When did I start to get excited about a sale at the grocery store?
How did a quality carpool become something to envy?
What happened to my boobs?
Annette Piper says
I so agree with EVERYTHING you’ve said. You sure we weren’t twins separated at birth!?
Kimberly says
LOL!! I wonder all of those same things! Let me know if you ever figure out the answers..please đ
theneatos says
adorable post!
well balanced meal? yours has fruit? Man – Mag warms up chili, pours it on fritos and calls it a meal!
for my childless anniversary weekend? Mag and I went to dinner, did laundry, watched a movie and mowed the lawn. Lookit the party animals.
Savvy Mode SG says
i think i will hang onto single life for a while….
Elizabeth says
So well put! This is an awesome list. My favorite is “what did I do before kids?” It was only 15 months ago, and I’m totally clueless as to what the heck my life was before this munchkin came along!!
PS – I’ve just tagged you in a super-short meme over at my blog so come for a quick visit. đ
Millennium Housewife says
Oh dear, no answers I’m afraid but you’ve just given me a lot of questions. Other Mothers do that grunting thing too? I must tell Husband. Do Other Mothers wake up in the night and wonder what the hell happened? Hope so MH
Mary K Brennan says
Sorry about your boobs. Maybe they’re at the bar with the boobs I lost after childbirth enjoying a couple of margaritas. Since I don’t get to go to those places anymore, I’ll have to be satisfied with my current droopy status.
How do we do it?
Jennifer says
Oh my gosh, are you reading my mind?!? ROTFLOL! These are GREAT questions!
Liz says
Love love Love your post! I think all that came with age. Thank you for the wonderful comment you left at my blog. I really had a great laugh here really your post.
Lizzie says
those are GREAT questions!! thanks for coming by my blog đ
The Holmes Crew says
Thanks! I need that!
Oh, and by the way – I’m the only one capable of changing the roll here too!
Margo says
yes, I can relate to these things. Even with two daughters, I’m the only one who can handle “mission toilet paper”… ditto for all kinds of basic operational procedures!
Martha says
I have no answers for anything except the Boobs. Gravity at work my dear. So please add a good bra to the fab jeans and bikini list. Thanks, MM.
Carrie says
Oh, LOL! unfortunately, I can relate to too many of these…hee hee!
Thanks for stopping by! Glad to meet you đ
pam says
All excellent questions! Although I am the opposite at a clothing store, I grab and go and try on at home. Then return them when they don’t fit.