A built in invisible friend.
This wee friend advises me when my car is low on gas and where the nearest service station is.
She points out the nearest Hospitals and clinics..helping me to embrace my inner hypochondriac. She makes me feel all safe and cozy like.
She answers the phone for me. I just have to press a little button on the dash that says accept or ignore. Doesn’t matter how loud the music is, she turns the music off for a moment to see if I want to take the call.
My little invisible friend even learns my favorite songs on the radio and lets me know when they are playing on another station!!
Quite possibly my favorite thing about the voice that pops out of my speakers is that she knows how to get me places. Ahhh yes, she is the Queen of Directions. How I love and depend on her built in Global Positioning System. Perhaps depend and GPS should not be allowed in the same sentence. This is where I get in to trouble.
If my invisible friend tells me I must go straight, even if my brain is screaming “TURN, TURN Right you idiot” I defer to the GPS. My invisible friend couldn’t be WRONG!
If my invisible friend tells me to take Lake Shore in 300 metres but I really think I should continue on to Lake View, who do I listen to? Well the sweet calm voice of my invisible friend of course. She has steered me the long way around a few times but I always get to my destination.
Until…
I asked my little friend how to find a remote cottage for my girls weekend.
I programed in the address and she answered “Route Complete“.
No problem baby, thanks to technology I can do anything. Time to kick back and enjoy the drive.
1 1/2 hours into my drive my dear sweet invisible friend announced.
“You have entered an unmapped area. Please refer to your road map for the completion of your journey”
WHAT??
I am in Bumble %#&*
I do not have a map. I have you!
“Drive Safely. Goodbye” She said.
Oh no, don’t leave me! Re-compute. Re-calculate! Come Back!!
“I’m sorry. This area is not currently mapped. Please refer to your map”
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!
Now what. Okay. Cell Phone.
doot do do do doo do doot
No Service.
CRAP on a STICK!
Great, now I have to try and use this pretty little head of mind. Ha.
I was a mere 5 minutes from my girlfriends cottage and yet had to ask three different groups of people for directions before I finally arrived, red faced, at my destination.
It is official. GPS is making me stupid.
Exmoorjane says
Ha! I just knew there was a good reason to avoid GPS and other gizmos…I#’ll stick to my map.
Glad you liked the camping story – it was actually really good (and I was always the one who swore she would never EVER go camping!)
Martha says
Cute post!! I hate GPS w/a passion, don’t own one and I can read a map, thank you very much!! I don’t like to be told what to do and the voice is so annoying!!!
Grumpy, M.D. says
Hell, it’s making my patients stupid too. They come in and argue with me that my office isn’t where the GPS says it’s supposed to be.
Like it’s MY fault!
JennyMac says
LOL…we have GPS in our cars too…and have gotten to a few places that are unmapped. Thats why I have a handy Atlas in the trunk. Borrow it? đ
Live.Love.Eat says
OMG, funny. We had a wee bit of a discussion regarding the good ol’ GPS while on vacation. Hubs loves her, I do not. For this reason.
Baking Momma says
Oh that was too funny. I loved it. Yea I would say I need one of those little friends. Sometimes you want to get lost lol
ihatemichigan says
That’s funny. GPS systems annoy me, so I can imagine how frustruating it woul dbe if they didn’t even get you all the way to your destination.
Courtney Kirkland says
lol that sounds every bit like something i would do. try getting gps on your cell. that map EVERYTHING and update themselves so you don’t have to do it.
Little Ms Blogger says
There used to be a great auto insurance ad in which the driver just followed the directions of his GPS. He was cruising along and turned right per his GPS guidance into a storefront window.
It was hysterical.
I old school things and use MapQuest.
Eve says
AHAH! This made me smile so much. I have to say though, despite your imaginary friend leaving you when you needed her most I’m really impressed with the amount of things she can do!
I’m obviously very out dated because I had no clue they could do all that!
Hilarious post. đ
Adventures In China says
Are you my mom? đ I always tease her that her GPS/Onstar is making her soft.
I can relate to having to ask people multiple times about where I’m going. It’s like they all just KNOW, with no maps. It’s a mystery.
Of course, the Chinese educational system encourages memorization. I guess that extends to bus routes and street locations, too.
Hope you had a great time at your off-the-map cabin!
Too Many Hats says
LOL – I would have been in your same shoes. Who carries a map anymore? I’m not sure I could still read one at this point.
Ashley says
oh this story is hilarious! I must say your little invisible friend sounds awesome… until you get into unmarked territory but still!
Nancy@ifevolutionworks.com says
Ugh, I don’t think I could handle that little voice all the time. The one seatbelted in the backseat is enough.
Lady Mama says
Haha! I need one of these little friends in my car! I am absolutely hopeless with directions too – I will literally get lost wherever I’m going if it’s somewhere new.