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How to Survive Life in the Suburbs

In Pursuit of a Giftbag

in Everyday on 09/16/09

A quick trip into Zellers.

I just need 1 gift bag.

Pink.
Perfect.
On sale.
Even better!

Oh and there is no line at the cashier. This is my lucky day!

What the hell???

Well excuse you family of five..perhaps you have some emergency to get to?
Go ahead, by all means, take that cart that is CRAMMED FULL of stuff for your University student (damn University town) and butt right in front of me.

Manners much!

zip ding
zip ding
zip ding
zip ding
zip ding
Good Grief ..you know when I am at the grocery store and someone comes up BEHIND me…I let them cut ahead. I let them play through. I am a courteous citizen of the world!! I was in front of you, besides, everyone knows 1 item to zip ding through is a whole lot faster then errrr 18.

zip ding
zip ding
zip ding
zip ding
zip beep….”Can I get a price check at 4”

Are you kidding me?
Foot starts tap tap tapping….

zip ding

zip ding

zip ding
FAAAARRRTT

zip ding

zip ding
Huh?

Did he just?
Did they just?
Oh help…the toxic smell!

Man fart.
I must step back .

My stomach is threatening to reveal this mornings eggs.

Silent gagging…

zip ding

zip ding

zip ding

This dude didn’t even flinch!
He didn’t try and hide the fact that he cut the cheese! He didn’t accidentally sneak a cheek, he just let er rip!
How much longer do I have to stand next to these line cutting stinkers??

“Would you like to sign up for our store credit card?”
They say yes!!

Huh? Sorry. Rude.

I am outtie.
No stupid gift bag is worth this kind of wait.
Life is too short to stand in this toxic cloud of poo smell created by random pushy strangers …..all in the name of a gift bag?
I’ll just use a freakin ribbon.
  • « Gluttony
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    Comments

    1. diane says

      September 20, 2009 at 3:18 am

      Hahaha, you poor thing! That family was probably running late for their appearance on the Jerry Springer show.

    2. Girl With The Golden Touch says

      September 19, 2009 at 11:59 pm

      No way!!! How frigging rude!!

      xx

    3. Theta Mom says

      September 19, 2009 at 5:03 pm

      I hate when people cut in, especially THOSE people. I would have been so outie, too.

    4. Julie says

      September 19, 2009 at 1:27 pm

      I’m here getting caught up on a week’s worth of blog reading. Is there any coffee? Happy Saturday!

    5. ~Just me again~ says

      September 19, 2009 at 3:04 am

      I hate when people do that, I too let people with one or two items in if I have a poop load of stuff.

    6. Mrs. Fish aka Two Fish says

      September 18, 2009 at 10:22 pm

      OMG the nerve. And then the toxic ass dusting. I would have said “Um its bad enough you wouldn’t let the person with ONE ITEM go ahead of you so then you drop ass on me?” GROSS!!

      People. Ugh!

    7. Jessica (BookLover) says

      September 18, 2009 at 10:07 pm

      I would have been out of there, too, before they managed even more of a stinking delay!

    8. Michelle says

      September 18, 2009 at 6:14 pm

      Oh my gosh, you had me laughing so hard!! I can relate and totally understand your frustration with this sort of thing!! I always let someone cut ahead of me if they have so much less than what I have. It’s called courtesy but some people…well…they have just never heard of that word before in their lives. Ugh.

      Thanks for coming by my place! I am really enjoying your blog as well.

      Happy Friday!

      Michelle 🙂

    9. CynthiaK says

      September 18, 2009 at 5:44 pm

      That stinks!! (pardon the pun)

      Wow, I don’t know what I would have done in your place. I always wish I’d had the guts to say something when people are idiots like that but I never think of it at the time.

    10. bananas. says

      September 18, 2009 at 4:16 am

      BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

      that is just foul! i would have left after the 20 something zip dings. how annoying!!!

    11. yonca says

      September 17, 2009 at 9:21 pm

      Ewwww..gross!
      I’m sorry you had to go through all that.

    12. Pam says

      September 17, 2009 at 8:31 pm

      Rude and stinky. Yuck! A double threat!

    13. Momma Such says

      September 17, 2009 at 8:11 pm

      OMG! How lucky for you! Ha ha! I would have left too!

    14. Secret Mom Thoughts says

      September 17, 2009 at 7:14 pm

      Wow that was beyond rude.

    15. Debbie says

      September 17, 2009 at 3:10 pm

      Gross! I can’t believe it. I’m glad you got out of there.

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    Travel addict, sun seeker, coffee drinker, fashion lover, picture taker. This is a peek behind the closed and competitive doors of the suburbs. A place to come to learn about the best places to travel with your kids in Canada, the United States, the Caribbean and beyond! stephanie@sassymodernmom.com
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