How to Survive Life in the Suburbs

Deep Thoughts, People are Rude

in Everyday on

Observed while in the viewing room at a civilized Gymnastics’s Club…

Have you ever coughed so hard that you farted? The lady sitting beside me watching her child in the gym did tonight. Sucked for her, all kinds of funny for the rest of us.

I need some kind of privacy screen for my blackberry. Nosey girl on the other side keeps trying to read my texts.

If your feet smell like donkey butt, feel free to be a rebel and break the “Remove Your Shoes” rule.

Egg Salad sandwiches have no business in an enclosed space. Besides, didn’t he learn a lesson from farty girl? Eating egg salad and then sitting in a warm crowded room for an hour is like taking your life in your hands. Risky.

I like little kids as much as the next person, probably more, but please, stop your baby with the snot bubbles blowing our of her nose after her 3rd rendition of Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer. That wee one’s gurgly tune is making me feel ill.

I am stoked that you got invited to the party when Cheryl didn’t. I can’t believe Scott said that. Are you sure you can’t make the movie? I DON’T CARE!!!! Get off your cell phone or walk down the bloody hall and have your private conversation. Don’t sit there and pretend there is no one else in the room. Rude.

Only 6 more years until this kid can drive herself to the gym.

Anybody want to carpool?

    • Comments

    1. I am so happy to have found your blog,honestly it brightens my morning with nods and laughter.This post is priceless!

    3. Oh man talk about rude, gurl I am the queen of rude I am rican , a puerto rican that is…

      If that lady farted and didnt say excuse me.. I would have been umm excuse you, excuse your sticky ass out of here… before I barf on ya….

      As for the girl trying to read my text…. again what the f you lookin at? huh you want a piece of me… do ya…… do ya want to know what happened to last chic that tried to read my textes… back off!!

      As for the baby with the boogers dude I said I was sorry.. next time I will leave the disgusting kid at home… LOL

      Later!

    9. So funny! My other favorite rude is being in a public bathroom and someone is talking on their cell phone while they are in a stall. Once I had to leave and go use another bathroom. I just couldn’t go with them talking.

    11. At least it gives you awesome blog material… have to look at the good side, no? 😉

      I’m so glad I don’t have kids, LOL!

      But my dogs do stink. Sigh.

    12. Oh good God, seriously? I guess I would be able to forgive the fact the sickly’s are infecting everyone since their kid wants them there and all, but come on. And who in the world, would think eggs are okay. Gross. Next week I would come not showered and coughing (fake or not) and bring in some tuna fish with fish oil doused over it. Don’t eat it. Just open the festering container and let it sit there.