Pulled hair from the drain. Got enough to knit me a sweater for the cat. Yep, I’m going to find a use for the hair that made me throw up in my mouth just a little bit. That’s how I roll.
Trying to decide if that is poop or chocolate smeared on my brand new towels? Smell test is the only way to know for sure. Whew, chocolate.
Squished giganticor the bug with nothing except butt wad. This is not sufficient weaponry for squishing a bug that has eyes so big I can see it’s pupils. Shiver and squeal!
Snuck a dark chocolate square from the brand new box, it was covered with crystallized sugar, yummers, so I popped it into my mouth when no one is looking. Quickly discover it was NOT crystallized sugar it was SALT. Gag. A ton of salt. Big chunks of crunchy salt. Gag. Gag. No wonder the damn things were on sale.
I politely swallowed down warm sushi at the dinner party, that I didn’t want to go to anyway, cause there was simply no where else to put it. Ick to warmish fish. I just know I’m gonna see that again.
Sat next to a sweet little old man at the optometrists office. Sweet little old man had massive B.O. issue. UG. Doesn’t someone love him enough to tell him he is a bit smelly?
Apparently I have developed a new super power.
The super power of the dry heave.
Sexy.
Thanks to all who vote for me the Gagging Suburban SuperMama this week.
Top Mommy Blogs reset their numbers again! Mwah!
Randi Troxell says
uuuggghhh… hair in the drain.. HATE THAT…
salt and choc. yea, not so sure about that one!
Sara @ Domestically Challenged says
you are always such a hoot! I love these!
Laura@SouthernPirates says
picking myself up off the floor…lol
Laura@SouthernPirates says
picking myself up off the floor…lol
waterwaif says
Oh, I’ve had to wonder poop or chocolate many, many times. I asked once, did the sniff test. Never again. Now I don’t ask. If it’s questionable, it needs to get its ass in the hamper!
Crazy Shenanigans says
Ugh! I gagged just on the hair story let alone the rest.
Busy Bee Suz says
Who would put salt on chocolate? That is so wrong….gaggable.
Peggy says
With three girls in the house,we use to have hair drain issues here too, till we discovered those little rubber drain traps that you put over the drain while you are showering. It catches the long hair and solves the problem of cleaning out the drain later –Ugggh!!
misszippy says
Oy vey. Trying to decide which was the worse of all of that! I guess I’m going with the smelly old man. Here’s to better times!
The Girl Next Door Grows Up says
That was a hard week. I swear at least once a week I throw up a little in my mouth – euww.
Too Many Hats says
Eeewww – smelly old man. That would have been the worst one for me. I probably would have gotten up and pretended to look at glasses.
Brian Miller says
oh my. what wonderful textures to this one….i may need to go brush my teeth.
Tinika says
Ha. Too funny. Off to vote for you, I think it was reset again.
Adventures In China says
I just realized I have never in my life had to ask: chocolate or poop? Thanks, child-free life! But, salt for sugar? Yes, and it is JUST MEAN. I can’t imagine who likes salty chocolates.
I love sushi, but I’ve always had it ice cold. I am now thankful for that, too.
Danica says
HA! Oh to be a mother!