How to Survive Life in the Suburbs

Awkward Moments Courtesy Of Granny?

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So I kind of thought I was the pioneer in this family of writing the passive aggressive love letters, voicing my inner most thoughts for the entire world to see, you know getting it all down on “paper”. 

Turns out I am but a babe.   My Granny, she is the grand dame of letters and poetry and she showed her stuff at Christmas.

As I lay upstairs tossing my cookies having my pity party for one.  My fabulous Hubby carried on and made sure my entire family still had Christmas. This included drinks, appetizers, a full turkey dinner and of course the traditional gift opening.  This year, with a twist.  My sweet old Granny, in her 93rd year, had written MY Husband a poem and recited it aloud for the entire family.  I missed the whole damn thing.  Don’t worry, don’t worry!  I got my hands on a copy!!!  So without further adieu, a poem, from MY Grandmother to MY Husband.  Oh yes, let the Awkward begin. 

(and for the record I adore my Grandmother and think her brilliant beyond words…I just don’t have a clue where the hell this poem came from?  Perhaps it was helped along with some Sherry? )

Dear B

Do you remember our Christmas last year

When you opened your gift with the greatest of cheer

Only to see half a bottle of wine (Oh yes she did. Last year she gave him a HALF a bottle. That’s how she rolls)

And cried with great sorrow “Is this truly mine?”

So this year the bottle is full to the brim

For you to enjoy and to keep yourself trim

And never for get that I wish you much joy

For my Grand-Daughters Lover’s a really great boy!

Oh. YES. SHE. DID.

Oh Grandma.  Sigh.  You are one of a kind.  Thanks for the giggle and helping to make this Christmas one we will never forget. 

    • Comments

    1. I love that she gave him half a bottle of wine for Christmas – hilarious! And that she wrote him a poem! She sounds like an amazing lady.

    7. Grannies are the best. You are so fortunate to still have yours! The gift of writing does run in the family!
      Happy New Year Friend!
      XXOO