How Not To Get Ready For A Vacation

I am leaving for a week’s long vacation in three sleeps?  Yes three!  This should have me jumping up and down with excitement, instead all it has me doing is walking in aimless circles with sweaty palms and a racing heart.  I have SO much to do in the next four days it is almost paralyzing.  Reality is setting in and with it this sick realization; this Mama is just not getting it all done. This my friends is “How Not To Prepare For A Summer Vacation”

* Plan a pool party for your kiddos two days before you plan to leave.  Good intention, bad timing.

*Decide to clean out your front hall closet.  You do not have time for this kind of chaos. (and where the hell did all of those shoes come from?)

*Do a huge grocery shop five days before you leave.  Duh?  You aren’t eating your way through all that produce in the next few days, you don’t have time to cook all that healthy crap let alone sit and eat!

*Decide to double up on your coffee intake to see if it can help you power through your day a little faster.  Rookie move.  This just makes you jittery and scatter brained.

*Book a three hour hair appointment two days before you leave.  Seriously?  Has the vanity insanity gone this far?  You have to have your “blonde on” to sit on a dock?  Um, guess so! I wonder if my hairstylist would mind if I sat with  my laptop powered up during my appointment! Maybe the tinfoil in my hair would help with internet reception?

*Say yes to just one more project.  You know, because the regular stuff like looking after two busy girls, household crap, a cat who won’t shut up (meow, MEOW, MEOW) and visit’s to Granny’s house aren’t keeping you busy enough.  Might as well just keep piling it on!

So if you don’t see me around for a while, it’s because I am walking around the house, writing huge to do lists but never scratching anything off, and dreaming of driving away from the suburbs and landing in peaceful cottage country.  I will be dreaming of this place….

This may not be the ideal way to kick off our last summer vacay of 2013, but no matter what I have to leave “undone”, I will get myself and my family to this very, very happy place.

See you on the flipside! Mwah!