How to Survive Life in the Suburbs

I Might Be A Hypochondriac?

in Everyday on

I’m sure because my big toe is stiff and oddly white on top it is broken.  Other reasons I’m sure it’s broken, cause it’s numb and uncomfortable and hurts when I wear my favourite shoes and my favourite shoes can’t be wrong!  That toe, she’s broken. Oh and maybe because my 220 lb Great Dane stepped on it.  Hard.

I’m positive that super scary spider with HAIR that just skirted across the deck was a Brown Recluse.  Girls! Poisonous! Danger! (totally normal reaction)

I felt a sick sense of relief when I compared legs with my sister at the lake this summer.  Her sunspots look just like mine and have been checked out by a Doctor.  No more need to prowl the skin cancer sites and images on google.  I’m in the clear on this one baby!

I have NUMEROUS “doctor.com”, “diagnose your bad self” type sites marked as favourites and I sneak on them when my Hubby isn’t looking.  These sites are good for no one. Every diagnosis ends with…seek immediate medical attention!  Can’t one of these sites just once tell me; You have a common cough due to cold. Go to bed and drink some tea. Make your Husband look after the kids.

I need my Hubby to reassure and remind me that my chest muscles (yes I said chest muscles..they are somewhere under where my boobs are supposed to be) HURT because I choose to try and outrun the rain with a big ass, overfilled, grocery cart at Costco.  I am NOT having a heart attack.  I am just a dumb ass.  Perhaps if I’d just said no to the 10lb jar of pickles and 5 lb bag of chocolate chips I could have made that quick turn with the cart without re-injuring that old muscle strain and rib injury.  Again, I am a dumb ass.

Every sore throat could be strep.  An upset stomach in the family means it’s time to break out the Lysol and cancel all the plans, and I truly believe Purel and Vitamin C are a Mama’s best friend.  So yeah, if these things make me a hypochondriac, I have decided to simply embrace it.  It’s just one part of the crazy that makes me who I  am.

Still love me?

    • Comments

    1. It’s so hard to know whether something is a minor inconvenience or signs of a serious illness; we hear so often of someone who thought it was “just indigestion” and ended up dying from a heart attack. I think it makes us all abit “hyperchondracal” (my madeup word may one day become commonly used – lol)

    2. 🙂 I think we all do this a little bit. But as someone who has a couple of severe hypochondriacs in my family, I totally agree….looking at these sites is a terrible idea!

    4. I think the web exacerbates this. Every time one of us ‘suffers’ from something we hunt up what it could be, could lead to … Know your body and listen to it – although comparing sunspots and moles is never a bad thing! No calling yourself a dumb-ass regarding medical issues allowed 🙂

    5. Dr. Google is not your friend! lol! Every time I’ve googled symptoms, it always ends with SEEK IMMEDIATE MEDICAL ATTENTION. Google had me believing it my not quite 2-year old had cancer. Scary stuff. Family doctor couldn’t explain a brown line under her nail. It worried me. I googled it. I wish I hadn’t. We went for testing and saw specialist. Turns out she has a small mole in her nail bed. As the nail grew, the pigmentation caused a line to appear, similar to when you bruise the nail bed. Not cancer. Thank goodness.

      We all worry about these things. We’re moms. It’s like it’s hardwired into us. Bring on the Purel, Lysol and Vitamin C! 🙂

      • Ugh. I’m SO sorry that happened to you…and can quite honestly say I would have gone down the same rabbit hole. I’m so happy to hear it was just a mole! I think we both need to pinky promise to stay off Dr Google!

    7. I work in health care and am actually the opposite of a hypochondriac. My hubby and my mother-in-law? Hypochondria is just the beginning :).

    8. But how many times has your Mom radar detected something was actually wrong? You’re a great Mom/wife! And absolutely still love you! ❤️

    9. I have some of those same issues and it’s always hard to figure out what’s what but they also teach us to follow our own instincts which can save ones life.

    10. I think we are all a little guilty of using Dr Google to self diagnose ourselves !!

        • Hey,we women always try to spread ourselves too thin. We are always rushed,stressed and tired.You will as I am now look back on this when the kids are moved on and it’s just you and hubby and you would welcome those days again.Simpler times will come again.