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How to Survive Life in the Suburbs

It Takes All Kinds & I Milked A Cow?

in Everyday on 09/20/10

Have you ever seen a 17 year old “parent” yelling at their kid to “cut the line” and “dodge to the front” while a lit cigarette dangles from their mouth?  Classy.

Have you ever paid $5.00 for the privilege of having the pants scared off you as you ride in the sky much higher then any human person should be ….with nothing but a few cables keeping you from certain death …on the “Sky Ryder” over 2 miles of packed parking lot turned carney heaven?

P5250301Have you ever had to tell your kids it’s not polite to stare…. Yes even if that Mama is taking her baby’s blanket out of his stroller and using it as a shawl to keep herself warm.

Have you ever wondered why you need a license to drive a car but anyone can have a kid?

Then you were probably at the same county fair I was this weekend!  What is it about the fair that brings out the different and the strange?  I witnessed screaming matches, finger wagging and foot stomping….and that was from the so called parental figures. 

On more then one occasion I bit the inside of my cheek so I wouldn’t offer unsolicited advice…like you know, “It’s freakin cold out chic, put your kids sweater and coat on and stop blowing smoke into her precious pink lungs.”  By the end of the night all I could do was giggle and exchange conspiratorial looks with my Hubby. We are far from perfect parents but we do at least try and put the kids safety and needs first.  Sigh. 

In other news, I know at the very least, I gave my girls one good belly laugh on Friday night.  I was pulled from the crowd at the Pig Races to compete for a Dinner for Two.  I had to complete an obstacle course and then milk a cow?  Oh crap. 

Here I am “Blondie” as I was dubbed, getting my instructions, my wheelbarrow and meeting my competition.

P5250264 P5250265

Then I milked that cow.  Thank GOODNESS this cow was made of wood.  This girl from the Suburbs does not have any country in her, but I won that contest!  Dinner for 2 was a can of Pork and Beans with a candle taped to the side.  Humiliation complete. 

P5250266By the time the night was over we were stuffed with over priced fudge and elephant ears, and our arms were overflowing with a ridiculous number of carnival prizes that all the  good suckers  parents win for their kids.

P5250307We came, we laughed, we humiliated the Mom.  We will go back next year and do it all again!  Long live the Fair.

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    Comments

    1. Debbie White Beattie says

      September 2, 2017 at 11:33 pm

      We have a local fair every year and I remember going as a teenager; boy did we have fun.

    2. kathy downey says

      December 10, 2016 at 3:06 pm

      haha it certainly does take all kids,like the young woman i seen standing in front of Tim’s with a stroller with baby her belly ready to burst smoking away and drinking her coffee

    3. Polly says

      September 23, 2010 at 10:31 am

      It sounds like an absolute blast.

    4. kim says

      September 22, 2010 at 3:32 pm

      i love fairs like that but my dh refuses to go for exactly the reasons u mentioned….so we don’t go to them anymore. BOO! But I would have loved to win that pork and beans prize…lol what a riot!

    5. kyooty says

      September 22, 2010 at 9:51 am

      We haven’t bothered to take our kids to any fair! how bad are we?

    6. Mom's Me Time says

      September 22, 2010 at 3:34 am

      My first time visiting your blog… loving it! I am now following you. I would like to invite you to stop by and visit my blog @ http://mommetime.com.. would appreciate a follow back. Take care, Amy

    7. Debbie says

      September 22, 2010 at 1:54 am

      Sounds like a blast!
      And yes, there is nothing like a fair or an amusement park to bring out the nut jobs. (Not you, of course.)

    8. Technodoll says

      September 22, 2010 at 12:47 am

      Please tell me you had a deep fried _____? (fill in the blank with anything remotely unhealthy: mars bars, twinkie, bacon…) – what’s a fair without the calorie-free treats 😀

      he he

    9. Matty says

      September 21, 2010 at 10:22 pm

      We have an annual carnival that comes thru town here. You would not believe the people who show up. It’s like an outdoor Walmart of people. LOL

      You got me for a moment, thinking you milked a real cow. But the dinner prize sure does sound inviting.

    10. Tiaras says

      September 21, 2010 at 2:34 pm

      thank you for reminding me why I don’t take my children to fairs!

    11. my little world says

      September 21, 2010 at 12:11 pm

      How fun!! I love that game… I would have been in it as well.

      We had the fair here as well but we didn’t go.. It does bring out all kinds of people. If nothing else you can get a laugh at it.. those poor kids though..

    12. Jenn says

      September 21, 2010 at 6:00 am

      You definitely do get all kinds at fairs. We just recently went to one, and I was shocked to see that we were actually a minority, because we had manners. It’s amazing what must go through some peoples heads! It sounded like you had a great time though!

    13. Kristina P. says

      September 21, 2010 at 3:13 am

      Yes! We just went to the fair on Friday. I was really hoping to see some animals getting busy, but sadly, it wasn’t meant to me.

    14. ZenMom says

      September 21, 2010 at 2:26 am

      I haven’t been to a fair like this in years. Gee, look what I’m missing.

      I love the cow thing. Even with the humiliation, sounds like a good time was had by all.

    15. Crazy Shenanigans says

      September 21, 2010 at 1:25 am

      Haha, that sounds like the best fair ever! It sounds and looks like you were a good sport!

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    Travel addict, sun seeker, coffee drinker, fashion lover, picture taker. This is a peek behind the closed and competitive doors of the suburbs. A place to come to learn about the best places to travel with your kids in Canada, the United States, the Caribbean and beyond! stephanie@sassymodernmom.com
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